What to do when organizing another person's things

Sometimes we are forced to organize the space or possessions of another person.  You may think that is an obvious statement given my work with clients and their stuff.  However, I am talking more about working with someone close to you, or working with someone who cannot be there and do the work themselves.

My husband works very hard and also goes to school part time for his master’s degree.  His time is very precious and he has not had much of it over the last year and a half to go through old papers or make his desk a productive work-space.  As I have taken on these tasks myself I have learned a few best practices to add to my repertoire, specifically how to work with someone close to you, all the while preserving his final say and respecting his space and belongings. I hope you can use these strategies to perhaps help your children or spouse.

1. I usually let him know that I am attempting to organize something or some space and tell him up front that I won’t be throwing things away unless they are obvious trash.  This alleviates any fear he may have that I am just looking for an opportunity to get rid of his stuff.
2. I try to sort into categories I think make the most sense to him and not me.
3. I try to put the categories in storage places I think will be most intuitive for him and not me.
4. I label everything, including files, drawers and bins so he does not have to guess where things are.  This is crucial if someone needs to learn a new system of storage but did not create it.
5. I ask for five minutes of his time to show him where everything is and get his feedback on the placement.  If he wants something moved, it gets moved.
6. I wait until another time to ask him to look through the “trash” with me.  If there is a lot I break it into several little “sessions” so he does not feel overwhelmed.  We are more likely to sit down and do it together if it does not seem like a task that will take all afternoon.
7. I try to be patient of he asks me where something is instead of showing exasperation as he learns the new storage arrangement.  Remember that person was not there when you put everything away and they may need some grace and assistance.  

How to help your child clean their room

One of a parent’s big challenges is helping a child into the consistent habit of cleaning up his/her room.  This can be especially daunting when the child is young and easily distractible.  Many parents will tell a child to clean a room, only to come up 30 minutes later and find that not only is the room no better than before, but the child is playing with all the toys.  Giving your child a step by step process for cleaning a room when they are young is key to helping them maintain the habit as they get older.

Children are just as overwhelmed by clutter as adults, and the problem is multiplied when there is not a home for anything.  They are told to clean up yet they do not know where to start and they don’t know where anything should go.  Before a routine is set up the room should be (ideally) purged of unnecessary toys and a system of storage put in place.  Make sure to label all containers!  You have now set your child up for success by assigning everything a home.

Second, create a checklist for them to follow.  When you say, “Go clean your room”, there should be a process they can follow and replicate easily without your presence.  You may need to be there the first few times to keep them on track, but eventually your child should be able to execute the plan without you.

The checklist can have pictures if your child is not of reading age and the list should be short.  The most effective ones I have seen direct children to groups of toys and go something like this:

1. Put away all your books
2. Put away GI Joes
3. Put legos in bins
4. Spend 5 minutes putting clothes in drawers
5. etc

Remember to keep it simple and make the number of steps appropriate to the age of the child.  The younger the child the simpler the list and steps should be.  Make the checklist fun and decorate it.  You can laminate it and hang it on the door knob or just put it on the wall.  The bottom line is to give your child a structure so cleaning a bedroom won’t be as daunting anymore!

Preparing for school papers

School is officially here, and with it comes the often daunting task of keeping up with school papers.  Homework assignments that need reviewing, the permission slips for another field trip, the sports schedules and the list can go on an on.  The paperwork often gets lost, stuffed down in the bottom of a messy backpack or submitted after its deadline.  Staying on top of school papers doesn't need to be hard and frustrating!

First, choose a spot in your home, most likely your kitchen or entry, that is easily accessible to you and the kids.  If the school papers are not located in an area convenient and central it will be difficult to use your new system without a lot of effort.  Second, choose a paper storage method best suited to you and the age of your children.  There are many options and creative solutions available so it is essential that you think through the way in which it will be used and if everyone involved will be able to implement the system effectively. 

Paper trays stacked on top of one another are a popular solution.  A desktop file with manila folders works for some families, and still others who like their counter tops free of paper will use wall mounted magazine files.  Once you have picked your storage solution assign each child, you and your spouse a slot and label them.  Now you are ready to go!  When a child comes home with documents for review they go in your slot.  When you have completed the task the paper goes back in the child's slot or filed depending on the action needed.  The kid's slots can be used for any documents they are responsible for, or used as a temporary landing zone for art and other school papers that will need to be filed or added to the family calendar. 

Third, maintain your system.  Paper building up in the slots should be routinely purged and tossed or purged and filed.  The school paper management system will quickly become unwieldy if it is not inspected for excess on a regular basis.  Now enjoy the new home your papers have and your clean fridge and counter tops!

Keeping your fridge paper free

Is your fridge covered with a collage of recently created summer camp projects and artwork?  Have you been showered with all the papers from your children's wonderful days at camp?  Pretty soon you'll have school art papers to display again and the fridge is full!

Papers on the fridge can make it difficult to get at food and it also creates a look of clutter in the kitchen.  Instead of displaying art and projects in the kitchen, get a bulletin board for each child and put it up in their room.  On it they can can hang all their precious summer projects without taking over the kitchen.  As another option you can cover a sturdy piece of cardboard with colorful or plain fabric and let them decorate it for a personal touch.  Goodbye buried fridge!

Helping your kids get organized

It can be a frustrating battle when you attempt to “organize” your kids. Many times they are reluctant to change, and all the containers you buy and systems you create go unused. Helping a child (young or teen) achieve balance and order in their surroundings cannot be done by sheer force. They need to be actively involved in every aspect of the process and then given expectations for how their things will be taken care after the initial cleanse is complete. -First, let them purge with you. Ask the hard questions, like when was the last time they really wore that article of clothing or when they last used an old toy. Try to put everything in a positive light. Explain that in order for them to have room for the stuff they really, really want, other items will have to leave or be stored elsewhere. Do not go through your older child’s belongings alone…they will feel as if their opinions do not matter and become reluctant to change. -Encourage generosity. Many people, kids included, can be motivated by helping another. Pick a charity you know will give toys away to less fortunate families, or have your teen pick a charity of their choice to donate old clothes to. Be sure to recognize and praise their act of kindness. -Third, let your child go container shopping with you. Let him or her brainstorm with you about the best place to put the hamper, what shoe rack would really make it easy to store all the sports footwear, or the most convenient location for a desk. Be sure to get their input on any storage containers you want to buy. If someone loves a good solution, they will use it! -Finally, set the expectation that any system put in place must be maintained. No item will put itself away. Create clear guidelines and agree upon how often things will be put away and cleaned up, and then stick to the agreement. You are not only helping your child become more responsible, you are helping them foster good organizing habits!

Homework simplified

Homework is as important to your child’s academic success as the class room time. To insure your child has a productive and efficient homework session here are some tips you can put into place: 1. Make sure your child has a folder for all homework papers. He/she can easily grab homework from the teacher and simply slip it into the folder and then in the backpack. That way there is no question about where the papers are when the time comes to work on them! 2. Older kids should always record homework due dates in a planner. However, it can be difficult to keep track of dates in a planner when the page turns. Consider having your child paste a one month print out of the current month in their folder to keep track of due dates for the entire month. 3. Consider where your child prefers to do homework. If he/she prefers to be at the kitchen or dining room table, use a plastic box with a handle to store all their homework supplies. This makes clean up a breeze and homework portable. Be sure that the child returns the box to its proper home after every use. 4. If your child has a desk where homework can be done, be sure it is set up to accommodate their needs. Help them choose appropriate homes for all their supplies and purchase any desk organizers they might need if drawers are at a premium. Check out your local stores for great back to school sales!